As the web sergeant has requested a post on the blog here goes:-
What is the difference between bagpipes and an onion?
Nobody cries when they cut up bagpipes.
How many pipers does it take to change a light bulb?
five, one to change it and four to criticise his fingering.
What is the difference between bagpipes and a trampoline?
You take your shoes off to jump on a trampoline.
Over to you huffers and puffers.