Bling and burgers

A joint entry to try and get me up to date

The weather running up to Lilias Day was preternaturally sunny and fine so there were no surprises when the weather apps showed big black clouds and lightning for the big day. I didn’t care as I was to be wafted up the road in a big posh car pumping fumes and particulates onto my red faced and choking bandmates.
The best bit about Lilias Day morning is being able to drive through the Public Park, scooting about on the undulating turf is way better than humphing the Event Shelters from Big Mick’s garage. Setting out the stall is a chore and the Unelected Social Committee do it so well that I headed over to make sure my other stall wasn’t needing help then assisted James the Hat to prepare the Weavers Cottage for the day ahead then headed back to Websergeant HQ to get my kilt and chain of office on. Big Day.

The Preses (President) of the Kilbarchan General Society is driven at the head of the pageant throwing sweeties to the kids in the crowd, so there I sat with 7Kg of confectionary and the Polis won’t let me throw it. Some pencil neck has deemed it a health and safety risk, maybe on a diabetes and dental front but we’ve been doing it for 50 years with 0 casualties. The parade was going at a snail’s pace due to Batman and Robin meeting and greeting everyone along the route. I watched the band out of the back window and it looked grim out there in the sunshine and fumes, stopping and starting and getting messed around. Pipey hauled me into the band for the march through the park to the Arena, all bling and puff. Basso lost control of his beaters and launched one which was fielded brilliantly by Mickey Blue Eyes. As this was the 50th Lilias Day I’d asked the organisers if I could take charge of the bands in the arena. The look of horror when I announced that we’d play Hielan Laddie as a  salute to Miss Lilias made my day, then with the power going to my head I commanded Scotland the Brave and led the bands from the field to Green Hills laughing maniacally.

The stall was busy so, stopping only to steal a burger from the Scouts, I went on a tour of the park, stuff was happening everywhere; dudes on BMX, medieval reenactors, fitba and the highlight was KPB defeating all comers at the Tug of War. Don’t mess with the Band.

A huge thanks to everyone who helped on the stall especially Imac for his continued support. Later on there was the traditional Lilias BBQ at which spirituous liquor lubricated the social  interaction to the point of immobility. But not I, I was in bed for 10:30 as I had a flight at seven.

Kilted pipers playing and marching, the one in the centre is wearing a chain of office
The Preses of Kilbarchan General Society marching with the pipe band

Ardrossan Highland Games is a proper Highland Games with dancing and pipe bands and heavy athletics, the holy trinity of Sunday activities. We also drive to it so it’s a respectfully sober affair. James the Hat drove me down and as we weren’t playing we could rock up whenever, however I arrived just as Pipey decided he needed a Drone Monkey and was handed the tuner. The new tuner looks like an alien artifact and the first time round the circle I had it upside down. I really wish we’d play mince on the practice field and take a storming performance into the circle but personal errors bedevilled us again. A minister of the church had told us that the Lord was our ninth piper, I wish He’d learnt the tunes.

The Rugby Club sustained the Hat and myself with coffee and cakes and then we tested the Beer Tent, it passed. Back at the Event Shelter the Grade 4A players were honing the MSR and I was perfecting the ‘flash’ as Wee Rubber complained my Superbat boxers were blinding her. Ankles crossed from now on. I witnessed the new Countermarching for the first time, it looks impressive but it gave me a soupçon of unease; it looks great until just one person doesn’t get it and suddenly there are bodies everywhere not unlike the Dashing White Sergeant.  As we headed for the march past Wee Mel stuck her foot down a hole and was nearly trampled under foot as she attempted to get up, her carrying on as if nobody had seen it and she wasn’t in great pain was inspirational.

Thanks to the Chieftain for keeping it brief and to the RSPBA for arranging the weather.

Next up is the busy weekend.

Cannae wait..


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